When The Going Gets Tough

Image by helloimnick

A while ago, someone told me, “when you lose motivation, you’ve forgotten what you’re fighting for”.

I think about that a lot. In some situations, it’s completely true. Sometimes, it’s a lot more complicated. When it comes to writing, lack of motivation usually means one thing: I think I’m not good enough.

It’s not lack of motivation, it’s lack of confidence in myself and my abilities. My inner critic, whom I’ve named Jeff, is an amalgamation of all those people who made fun of me or my writing. Interestingly, this seems confined to writing. Tell me I’m terrible at maths and I will agree with you. Tell me my house looks like a cyclone hit and I’ll laugh with you. But my writing? That’s sacred, hands off.

Of course, I don’t expect everyone to like my work. Even if I’m your favourite author, you’re not going to like everything I write. And that is perfectly ok.

My inner critic Jeff is a jerk. He knows it and I know it. “You’re not good enough to pull this off,” Jeff says. Then Jeffs laughs at me. Sometimes, Jeff is too loud. Sometimes, he retreats into the dark burrows of my mind, tail between legs, ready to pounce next time.

The best writing advice I ever got was, just write. Even if your own Jeff says it’s shit. Even if you actually know it’s shit. Even if you don’t know what to write. Just write. There’s no perfect inspiration, no motivational pep talk, no magic formula. Just write.

A 12-step program for struggling creatives

Recently, I came across Julia Cameron in three separate mentions. Usually when things happen in threes, I take that as a sign. So I bought a copy of her seminal work, The Artist’s Way, and began the task known as Morning Pages. These pages are three handwritten pages of stuff. Stream of consciousness, unedited and raw. If you can’t think of anything to write, you write “I can’t think of anything to write” for three pages. Write that you forgot to get dog food or your fingers are cold or you have a headache or you don’t want to do this. Just write.

The purpose of these pages is to explore your creative block. For me, the first few days poured onto the page a plethora of self-sabotaging thoughts and how much I hated where I was, creatively speaking. I’ve been struggling to finish the last couple of chapters in my novel. I stopped writing altogether. Morning Pages showed me why.

I’m not good enough.

The mantra rattled around my brain until I gave in. I can’t write. I’m kidding myself. Those people who like my novel? They’re just being nice. I’m a fraud. A failure. Untalented. Lost in the sea of actual talent.

With the help of Morning Pages, I began to write again. I challenged myself to write a short story for an e-magazine. Telling myself this particular publication is a low bar; the editor accepts pretty much everything as long as all the words are spelled correctly. But the editor didn’t get back to me for two days. Two days. Was I wrong about the low bar? Did my story actually suck? Was Jeff right all along? My story did get accepted and will be published in the June edition.

Next, I challenged myself to enter another writing competition, called Literary Taxidermy. They give you the first and last lines of a famous story or poem, and you fill in an original story seamlessly joining these two lines. I entered last year and had a ton of fun writing about insurance fraud. This year, I started with an idea, and four drafts later, it’s still just an idea. As Julia Cameron says, creative recovery takes time.

I shall keep writing and rewriting this particular short story until I have something I’m happy with. How will that come about? Just write.

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Onwards & Upwards!

Image by Stormseeker

Today, I woke up to the news that Pitch Wars and #pitmad have been cancelled.

What the heck am I talking about??

Both events were initiated by a NFP helping authors connect with agents/publishers to get their book out into the world. Pitch Wars matched mentors with authors to polish their queries and manuscripts to the best quality, so authors can pitch their work with view to publishing. (The last event was September 2021; I only found out about it a fortnight ago. Was planning to participate this year.)

Pitmad is (was) a Twitter event where authors pitched their books in one tweet using the hashtag #pitmad. Only agents were allowed to “like” or “heart” the pitch. Then you would send the tweet plus your synopsis plus the first 10 pages (or whatever the agent asked for) to the agent/s. I participated last September even though my manuscript wasn’t nearly ready. (Naively, I thought if I got a request, I could whip it into shape fairly quickly… LOL. The event was fun and I was planning to do it again next month.)

These two events aren’t unique, although they were when they were developed ten years ago. Although I never got to enter Pitch Wars, and only did pitmad once, they formed part of my querying strategy for the year. I find myself inexplicably sad about the demise of these events.

Being competitions, the chance of me being chosen amongst thousands of talented entrants is rather low. Loads of amazing writers haven’t been lucky with these… but lots have. The best way to find an agent is still cold-querying ie researching agents and sending them your book info without them asking you to. (Due to relatively few agents in Australia, plus the whole covid thing, pitching to an agent at an event as they do in the US is highly unlikely.)

So yeah, I’m sad that these two events are shelved even though they formed only a very small part of my strategy. It feels like one less avenue is available, although there are so many similar events on social media. It’s also a bit FOMO; my draft wasn’t ready to be pitched last year and now that it’s almost done, I feel like I’m missing out on that chance. I might not have gotten anywhere, it I was going to try. And I did have a lot of fun reading other #pitmad pitches, retweeting, and commenting to get Twitter’s algorithms to place these wonderful pitches in front of agents.

Sigh.

It’s more than pen to paper

Image by Patrick Tomasso

The final chapters of my current manuscript have always needed rewriting. It was a soft ending, didn’t explain anything, and was abrupt. That’s what I did last week, worked on those final two chapters. Writing, rewriting, deleting the whole mess, writing and rewriting again. Rinse and repeat.

I sent those last chapters to my brilliant beta reader, who sent through some feedback, including a rather obvious plot hole I’d completely missed. Of course, this is the point of having a beta reader! She said the rewritten chapters were much better than the old ending. I replied that reading a similar genre solidified how the ending needed to happen for me. “Gosh,” she said. “Writing is so much more than putting pen to paper!”

So here’s a non-exhaustive list of how novels get written.

Writing

Obviously, the novel has to be written. There are so many things to remember when writing! Interesting characters, narrative arc, descriptive words, world-building, writing effective scenes & dialogue, the all important climax and conclusion…

There’s zillions of websites, books, YouTube videos etc that teach writers how to write. Yes, there’s talent, but there’s also a ton of skills to be learned and applied. Some break the rules. Some invent their own rules. Some adhere closely to rules. Some just write and work it out later. There’s archetypes and tropes and genre conventions to work with.

Basically, give people a familiar story done in a different way with a satisfying conclusion. And the bad guy has to die.

1. Research

Every novel has some level of research. Historical fiction has research of the time and place where it is set. Science fiction has sciencey bits which plausibly make sense. Romance… we’ll, I’ll leave that to your imagination!

Some authors research before they write, some do it concurrently, and others write first and fill in detail later. For The Magpie’s Call, I did a mixture of all three.

2. Draft

When I was young, I threw away so many stories because they were rubbish. Of course they were rubbish, they were first drafts! I was comparing myself to published works. I didn’t know there are several drafts, a thousand rewrites, substantial editing 🤦🏻‍♀️

Author Kali Napier says her debut novel started life as a 110,000 word epic. She stripped it down to the bare bones and basically rewrote it, ending up with ~80,000 words which was published.

3. Editing

Similar to drafting, editing is where someone reads the manuscript and suggests edits. Anything from spelling and grammar to story, changing paragraphs or whole chapters, deleting this, adding that.

Usually the author does this several times. Then, if they can afford it, they hire a professional editor. If the work is sold to publishing house, another editor comes on and does it all again.

4. Querying

Querying is the process in which an author finds a literary agent. The agent who loves it will shop it around to publishers. This process can take years. I’ve heard of authors who find an agent within months, but I’ve also heard of authors who haven’t found an agent after several years. And once you land an agent, they may or may not find a publisher willing to buy the book.

5. Legal

This won’t apply to most authors. When a prominent person writes a memoir, they’re gonna be name dropping and saying things about living people. The publishing house will have a legal department who need to read the manuscript (either whole or relevant bits) to avoid a defamation lawsuit. Sometimes the legal team of the person you mentioned reads it as well.

Interestingly, you can (usually) say anything you like about someone who has passed away. You can’t defame the dead… That’s why many stars of Old Hollywood are surrounded by allegations they were gay.

6. Publishing

Whether you’re represented by a publishing house or you’re self-publishing, there’s a lot to be done to get a book on shelves. Cover design, formatting the text (ie making all the lines nice and neat, no orphan words etc), printing proofs which need to be checked and double checked, then printing.

But there’s more! Marketing. It’s a big part of the publishing journey no matter which road you choose.

And then you do it all again…

Taking the Leap

Image by Sammie Chaffin

Compared to publishing, writing is the easy part. Every author starts out with some grand idea of where their novel will end up. Obviously, the end game is a major Hollywood movie starring your favourite actor as your favourite character. Duh!

Getting the book to the point of publishing takes a tremendous amount of time and energy and editing and swearing and coffee and tweeting and pulling your hair out and… Once you’re at the pointy end, where your book baby is ready to see the world, what do you do?

I’ve blogged about self publishing before, so I won’t go there. Instead, I’m announcing I am taking the next major step: I will be querying in 2022.

What does that mean?

Although some publishers accept non-agented submissions, most authors never make it past the slush pile ie the pile of manuscripts littering the desks of interns. Becoming a bestselling author by submitting unagented manuscripts does happen: hello Dervla McTiernan. It’s rare, though. Most authors get published by having a literary agent.

If they like your work, a literary agent will attempt to sell your book to a publisher. They have the contacts and the expertise. (Not all agented manuscripts find a buyer, but that’s another story for another time.)

Reality: it takes an average of two years and one hundred-plus rejections before you find your agent.

There’s several reasons for this:

1. Your query isn’t great

2. You’ve queried an agent who doesn’t represent your genre

3. Your work isn’t marketable right now

4. Your work is too similar to their other clients’ stuff; or, your work is really out there and doesn’t fit their vibe

5. It takes so long to find an agent because agents only open to queries during certain times of the year. Making a list of agents and stalking their website to see when they’re open to queries takes forever.

6. Where do you even find an agent??? Typing “literary agent” into Google yields hundreds of thousands of results. Then, you have to sort through each site until you find an agent who represents your particular genre. This also takes forever.

7. At the very bottom of this not-exhaustive list is: your work isn’t great. Generally speaking, agents won’t reject your manuscript if there’s typos or not-quite-publishable-editing. They’re looking for story, which is the most important thing in the world to a reader. Make sure there’s a good story.

Now that I’ve announced by intention to query WIP next year, I have begun making a list of agents who represent my genre. Thing is, my genre is a bit wishy-washy. It’s not YA (Young Adult) and it’s not women’s fiction. MC is 21, which places her in the NA (New Adult) category, and quite simply, there’s not a lot of NA books out there. Most agents I find want YA, and usually fantasy too. Despite this, I have a list of agents who will be receiving a query from me sometime next year, depending on when I finish editing this manuscript and when they’re actually open to queries.

So there you have it, folks. I’m heading down the scary rabbit hole of querying. Taking that leap of faith and hoping an agent catches me at the bottom.

Unlocking Your Characters

Image by Sixteen Miles Out

In Hamilton: The Revolution, Lin-Manuel Miranda notes that the key to unlocking George Washington was his humiliation at his very first battle. By unlocking this key part of Washington’s character, Miranda was able to come up with “who lives, who dies, who tells your story,” which is the undercurrent of the entire musical.

Recently, I received my fabulous beta reader’s sticky notes plastered over a printed copy of my novel (as yet untitled). My beta is amazing. She picks up things I didn’t notice, forgot about, didn’t realise it was a thing. I often ponder her notes and one in particular has caught my attention this week.

I have divorced characters who cannot stand to be in the same room as each other. My beta noted that they once must have felt tenderness towards one another yet that was never evident. Of course, there’s two obvious questions here: 1) does there have to be? and 2) why do they hate each other so much?

The key to unlocking these two characters came to me while I was driving to pick up my daughter from school. The husband, Julian, kept a shoebox of marital memorabilia hidden in his wardrobe, which was completely out of character yet made perfect sense (in my head). He’s not the sentimental type; in fact, there’s specific note that there aren’t any photos of his kids displayed in the house. Why would this cold guy keep memories of a failed marriage?

To unlock Julian, we need to know something very important about him: he’s not used to failure. He is a Judge. He has a ton of money and everything he wanted… except a wife who adores him. Keeping this box reminds him just how much he loathes failing.

The ex-wife, Emmaline, married him to ground herself. She’s flighty, a free spirit. She left the marriage, her family, her country, to marry someone she barely knew. Of course he’s bitter and angry. The marriage failed because neither of them could ever make it work, it was doomed from the start. And that’s why Julian treats his eldest daughter, main character Kate, with such contempt. He’s projecting all this hurt and anger onto her.

Once I unlocked this, I excitedly texted my beta. Love this! she wrote back. It makes perfect sense now.

I don’t really write backstories for my characters. I’d like to say I prefer them to showcase who they are on the page, but really, I have very little input into what they do. After this experience though, maybe I can give them a little backstory to explore their motives. it has made my story deeper and richer, all because my beta couldn’t see the love.

Editing in 2021

Image: Nadin Mario

Hello there. New year, new me, new blog post.

Or something.

I haven’t written for a while because school holidays got in the way. While some people can juggle four kids, a career, a tidy house with not a hair out of place, I am not one of them. I am in awe of these people.

But anyway, I’m here now and that’s what matters, right? Here’s an update on what I’ve been up to:

I have finished another draft of my WIP, tentatively titled Lest Ye Be Judged. When their friend is found dead at school, sisters Kate and Chyler discover a world of secrets. This new novel has been sent to a few beta readers. One, I used for my previous novel and she’s amazing. She picked up things I had missed, plus bits I needed to work on. The other one is new to beta reading but was chosen because she’s working on her PhD of Criminology and I needed some insight. She’s also a keen reader herself and loved The Magpie’s Call. Another is my cousin, who expressed an interest in reading my work. He’s picked up on some of my word choices. I say this with absolute sincerity, I am looking forward to their comments.

This novel isn’t historical fiction, unless you count everything before COVID as “historical”. And let’s face it, it kinda feels a lot like that. There’s no social distancing or masks in this novel, but they do use iPads and the internet.

I am also concentrating my efforts to earn money editing/proofreading/beat reading etc for other people. Over the holidays, I volunteered to edit a book for middle graders (is there an Australian term equivalent to “middle grade”?) which whet my appetite for more. I’ve done a website (not yet live) and told pretty much everyone that this is what I’m doing.

Interestingly, I am trialling a pay-what-you-can-afford approach. In the past, I have quoted a price and had people say it’s too expensive, regardless of whatever price I choose. They don’t get work done, and I don’t get paid. A couple of months ago, two people out of the blue contacted me for work and I said my price was whatever they wanted to pay. One paid rather less than the other, however they both got the same work and the same effort from me. And they were both happy with the results, which is always the right outcome. Because of these two, I have been approached with more work. From my point of view, it’s win-win.

This year promises a ton of opportunities, which I gladly receive with both hands. Just this morning, I was presented with the opportunity to be a mentor for senior high school students. They are to present an Independent Project (ugh) and some have chosen to publish a book. As I’ve been through the process myself, I was invited to become their mentor. I can’t begin to tell you, dear reader, how exciting this opportunity is, and how much it terrifies me to impart my so-called wisdom.

Speaking of imparting wisdom, in a few weeks, I will be presenting a talk at my local library. It’s called Marketing for Indie Authors and every day, I tell myself I have no idea what I’m doing. Of course, I do (I think?), as I’ve done several campaigns for clients wanting to promote their book. They’ve been happy with the results. Imposter syndrome gets me every dang time!

Also on the calendar, I have been invited to speak at the Moreton Bay Readers & Writers Festival, to be held over the June/July school holidays. As well as selling my book/s, I will also be on a panel of local authors talking about genre. Mine is historical fiction. (Perhaps I’ll make the same joke about pre-COVID being “historical”.) I certainly don’t claim to be any kind of expert in the field, but I do enjoy researching the depths of history.

Speaking of history, I was at it again during NaNoWriMo 2020. I began writing a sequel to Magpie. It needs a ton of work on it, but hey, that’s what first drafts are for!

This blog was written as I’m procrastinating. I have a novel which I’m supposed to be editing, but I am finding it hard work. I just want to scratch a red pen over it with the words, “Suggest complete rewrite”. So, I’d better go do that then…

“It’s not as good as the first one!”

Image by Markus Winkler

How many times have you been super excited for Part 2 (or 3, 4, 5…) only to say, “the first one was the best”?

Today, I “won” NaNoWriMo, passing the 50,000 mark this morning. The project I did the most work on is actually a sequel to my debut novel The Magpie’s Call. Although I’ve tried a few times to continue Aurelia’s story, I never found the groove. This, which I must warn may never see the light of day, focuses on Annie and what happened after Magpie.

It was always going to be a tough ask, to continue the story of someone who was a secondary character in the first novel. I’m the first to admit Annie wasn’t terribly interesting, yet I’ve discovered that writing her for the sequel, she’s a lot more interesting that I gave her credit for.

The feel, theme and tone of the sequel is completely different to The Magpie’s Call. Not only because the Richmond family are barely mentioned, but because Annie has moved on. She’s away from Camden Park and on her own now. She’s facing choices she doesn’t know how to handle. She’s doing the best she can considering the position she’s found herself in.

All of this makes me very nervous to continue with this story. It’s one thing to have a novel which people like (and tell me so), it’s quite another to write more of the story and have people say, “What the heck happened?” As yet, no one has seen this first draft, nor have they been told what happens, but it’s my own inner reader that wonders if this is a story which needs to be told.

Does Annie find happiness? Where does she go after she’s forced out of the Park? What happened to Ruby? Does Edward find her?

All of these questions are answered in Part 2. The answers may not be satisfactory to readers. I think that’s a part of what scares every writer: will my readers unlove my work once they read this?

And that’s why the Magpie sequel may remain unread, trapped in a Cloud somewhere in the ether.

Writing is Healing

Image: Thought Catalog.
Poem: Internal Bleeding, from Bloodline by Ari Eastman.

One of the themes for next year’s Moreton Bay Readers & Writers Festival is ‘writing is healing’. I’ve always found that to be true.

Whenever I have something really important to say, I will write it instead of speaking. I have been known to send letters I probably should have burned… But at least I felt better, right?

The protagonist in The Magpie’s Call, Aurelia Richmond, is who I wished I could be at that age. Growing up, I believed I didn’t have a voice, and if I did say something, I wasn’t heard. Aurelia’s sass is how I wished I could be, and her quick wit is something I wish I possess, both aged 13 and now.

I’ve recently read two autobiographies by women who were in toxic relationships: Mariah Carey and Jessica Simpson. (I love reading biographies/autobiographies! I love learning about people who aren’t me.) Mariah, of course, was married to then-head of Sony Music, Tommy Mottola, while Jessica was married to Nick Lachey and also a toxic relationship with John Mayer. In these relationships, both Mariah and Jessica gave away their power to a guy, and it messed them up.

The balance of power is important in a relationship. Any relationship, not just a romantic one. Your self-worth is not tied to how they feel about you, yet many people unconsciously beat themselves down to match validation from their partner.

Ouch.

I’m no exception. This year marks fifteen years since my ex broke up with me. The other milestone of that relationship is that this year is also half my life ago that I met him. Half my life. Who I am today is influenced by him, and since I’m pretty darn awesome, I’m happy for that.

But I didn’t see that back then. Who I was was so tied to him, I didn’t know who I was without him. Every part of my life was intricately tied to him. And when that rope finally broke, I had nothing left. Balance of power, see?

So I wrote. Although it’s been a long time since I got over him, I’m still healing that person I was during that relationship. I was a house before I met him, he was a tornado that tore me apart until I was rubble on the ground with no insurance to rebuild. I revisited that time as I wrote, recalling how naive I was, how scared I was to live a life without him in it, and how much I hated what I had gotten myself into.

The actual dumping no longer upsets me. It’s a scene from a movie I’ve watched a million times. I’m still sad for that person who thought so little of herself that she wanted back into the poison. And that is why I write.

NaNoWriMo: 2020 Edition

Image: Hannah Grace

I’ve done NaNoWriMo for a few years, but not since my daughter was born. Although I read about a wonderful woman who wrote a PhD thesis in five-minute blocks while her 3 children under 5 did what kids do, I just can’t do that.

But here I am, ready for NaNo2020!

I started a project (writers never have stories or novels, they’re “projects”) a few months ago when I needed a break from WIP, tentatively titled Lest Ye Be Judged. Untitled Project is about two siblings whose father has been dead five years, and his newly found will is being contested by half-siblings and their mother. I’d written about 13,000 words before going back to Judged and decided to do some more on Untitled Project for NaNo.

I got about 8000 words into that before I got bored. I have written myself into a corner and don’t know how to get out. But more than that, NaNo is affecting the way I write.

(As an aside, I’ve kept writing my 1667 words a day on another project. Don’t get excited, buuuuuut it could be the sequel to The Magpie’s Call.)

On a normal writing day, I sit at my kitchen table, shove away whatever drawing or craft project my daughter has been working on, and write for at least one hour. Sometimes more, sometimes I’m clock watching. Some days I have a lot of words, some days I don’t.

During NaNoWriMo, the aim is to write 1667 words a day, for the thirty days of November. This is what I’m finding painful: word counts.

As a result, I’m struggling to write. How can I keep a story going organically? On normal writing days, my brain has full power or write whatever it wants, and it normally leads somewhere good. With daily word counts, all I find myself doing is getting enough to get to the 1667 words. Having said that, every day I’ve gone above that. Sometimes by a thousand, sometimes by a hundred. One day, I went over by 15 words.

I don’t think that what I’ve written over the past 10 days is very good. I tell myself it doesn’t matter: I can write whatever I want, see how it ends up, and trash it (in December) if I want to.

I’m in awe of writers who write like it’s a full time job. My brain and eyes get tired long before a full day writing. I can’t think straight and I can’t see straight. And there’s a headache thrown in too. (Yes, I wear glasses when using a screen.)

For those who have read The Magpie’s Call, I have placed Annie into the most unlikely situation. I want to keep writing to find out how well she responds to it. On the surface, she will not do well. But I think Annie is a deep character. It looks like she’s weak and naive, and she is, but she’s also come through a LOT in the year she’s been in Australia. Throwing her into a completely bizarre situation… I want to see how she does.

In the meantime, I am still 500ish words away from today’s word count, and I have to pick up my kid from school soon. Best get to it!

My Next Project

Photo by Valentin Antonucci on Unsplash

With the publication of The Magpie’s Call, I am working on my next project.

Tentatively titled Lest Ye Be Judged, it tells of two sisters whose best friend has been found dead. Although the death is ruled suicide, Kate and Chyler think there’s much more to the story. And there is…

This novel began during a time I was leaving Magpie alone. In everything one writes, whether it be a story, novel, essay or blog post, there’s always a benefit to leaving it for a while. Let your brain work on something else for a change. Allow ideas to flow through and creativity to nurture. But, I wanted to keep in the habit of writing, so I sat down and wrote for an hour every day until I had a first draft.

As far as first drafts go, it’s not the worst. Magpie was far worse! However, as I’m reading through it again, I’m aware of several plot holes that will need fixing. I’m also unsure what genre this fits into; main character Kate is twenty one, her sister Chyler just about to turn eighteen. As it stands, it’s probably YA (Young Adult). Not that there’s anything wrong with YA – I quite enjoy reading YA, as do other actual adults – but I think my niche should be adult fiction.

One could argue the same for Magpie. The main character was a teenager who had some nasty things happen to her and her family. Yet because of these themes, it fits better with Adult Fiction.

In any case, Kate and Chyler are my next project. I really like this novel. The name and circumstance of the opening chapter have been swirling around my head for literally years. I’ve tried writing it several times before but it never came together. This time, I don’t know if it’s discipline of writing every day or what, but I have a workable manuscript (apart from the aforementioned plot holes).

I’ve also included several character of marginalised communities in this novel. People identify with a wide range of communities, and it’s time everyone was included. However, I’ve tried not to stereotype people, nor to have one part of their identity be ALL they are. For example, main character Kate is a lesbian. She had a horrible breakup the year prior to the story, but her romantic relationships are not the focus. A minor character is a person of colour, but it’s not his skin that creates conflict between Kate and her mother. Another character has mental health problems. Suicide is the cause of death for the person who ignites this whole novel.

Of course, this lends itself to the question, “Why write minorities if their minority characteristic is not their identity?”

When you go grocery shopping, gay people aren’t screaming in your face that they’re gay. People of colour don’t stage BLM protests in the juice aisle. Non-binary people buy milk and bread just like you do. Just because someone is black, gay, disabled, or any other identity doesn’t mean that’s all they are. The purpose of including characters who are not cisgender, straight or white is not only inclusive but accepting. Everyone is a person. How they identify is none of our business, it’s theirs. One thing BLM should have taught you is that everyone wants to see themselves represented in media, even if it’s just “hey look, this person is gay AND the main character AND she’s awesome!”

I digress. At the moment I’m in school holidays; my daughter goes back to school next week. That’s when I can start closing some of these plot holes and make this book a whole lot better. I’m looking